The Islands of the Fraternal Order of Moai

Just to make it easy for those of you playing along at home...
Beardface Dumpster Juice = Willie Robertson
Nicklelback Ballad Song Lyric = Jase Robertson (Willie's brother)
Lynchy McRacist Noose = Phil Robertson (Wilie & Jase's dad)

I'd be happy to provide a spirited counter argument to this assertion, but you're capable of better.

First and foremost, you're trying to argue that Willie Robertson is not an authentic Louisiana redneck because there was a picture taken of him in the early 90s with a mullet?

That's not an argument!

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"He spits his chaw like venom"

Irish people don't get offended and complain.


We get drunk and burn it down.

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Will
The Luau Cinders



“I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.” —Dean Martin

Fixt



You sound like my High School Guidance Counselor.



Yes that's what I'm saying.


Tiki Vee circa 1990 rocking the King of Mullets

I'm saying this whole show is meant to trick people into thinking this backwoods family of incest gator rasslers' are in fact a real backwoods family of incest gator rasslers'.
They aren't.
Just like when the guys on Storage Wars open up a locker and find Alexander the Great's gilded skull underneath a stack of old newspapers...guess what....that wasn't really there and it's not really Alexander the Great. It's his brother. Doug the Mediocre and it's not worth nearly as much.

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We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.

FOM MC
President
Viva El Scroties!

Wait, is Tiki Vee saying reality shows are not real? I mean, they're called "reality shows"!!

These are some strong accusations.

Would you say this beautifully written preamble to MTV's long running harbinger of all things reality based is inaccurate?

"the true story of seven strangers, picked to live in a house, work together and have their lives taped, to find out what happens when people stop being polite... and start getting real."

You seem to have a lot of hostility towards that Duck whistle show. Have you seen "Two Broke Girls"?

While we're at it, you forgot to give Uncle Si a hilarious nickname.



1. Stop projecting your incest hang-ups on the Duck Men.
2. You're confusing "backwoods" with "small town".
3. They never claimed to be gator rasslers, although they did have to lure a gator out of Phil's garage in one episode. IIRC, they used raw chicken and there was no rasslin' involved.

Regardless, you've completely missed the point.

The initial point of the show, from A&E's standpoint was "let's laugh at dumb redneck stereotypes".
Much like Archie Bunker (let's laugh at dumb blue-collar stereotypes) and Alex P. Keaton (let's laugh at dumb 80's Reaganite stereotypes), it backfired badly. Millions of people identified with, loved and laughed with the people they were supposed to be mocking.

Here's the thing, they're not simple.

Sure, Phil grew up dirt poor, living off subsistence farming and hunting. But he was good athlete and earned a football scholarship to Louisiana Tech. He has a Bachelor's degree in Physical Education and a Master's in Education. He invented and patented really, really good duck call, and used that to start a business. He put his kids through college. Willie majored in business administration and used that knowledge to turn Duck Commander into a multi-million dollar company. It's a success story. The show doesn't hide any of this and it's all out in the open.

Same thing with the haircuts, or lack there or. Phil's been rocking the Lynyrd Skynyrd look since the 1970s. His boys came around much more slowly. Every picture you've posted has been shown on the program with along with lots of ball-busting.

They all live in a small town in Louisiana.
They manufacture duck calls and other hunting supplies.
They've become rich by doing so.
They do a lot of hunting, fishing, frog catching and golfing in their spare time.

The rest is just reality show ensuing of hijinks.

I fail to see the issue?

Ya know what. Now I'm pissed off. There are a dozen spin-offs about gigantic-assed Kardashians, 40 reality shows with dwarven women trash talking each other in every city in America, and all varieties of low-grade talent show programs, but you've reserved all your ire for Duck Dynasty?

There are infinite reality shows promoting infinite variations on narcissism, petty vanity, degeneracy, self-absorption, conspicuous consumption, mental illness and vapidity, yet you've singled out a few dudes with beards making duck calls?

What the hell?

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"He spits his chaw like venom"

It scares me how much you know about this show.

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We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.

FOM MC
President
Viva El Scroties!

WE'VE BARELY SCRATCHED THE SURFACE!!!!



YA WANNA SEE HOW DEEP THE RABBIT HOLE GOES?!?!?

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"He spits his chaw like venom"

Double ditto.

Afraid. Very afraid.

Sent from somewhere exotic

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FOM MC original

Excrementus Cadaemus

Beard Appropriation is my new band name.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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A toast to my friend Roger.

everyone eats pork™

I was reading through my new copy of Tiki Pop while this story was in progress. I hit the chapter on Tiki Devolution, and it struck me that we've come full circle. The arguments that were being used against Tiki in the 60s are the same arguments being used now. I found this quote from Sven Kirsten in an interview online that talks about it.



The cultural appropriation outrage that we see these days seems to be along the same lines. I think the point in the first paragraph is one that needs to be made as a counterargument more often. In many of the cases of "cultural appropriation", it stems more from a love and fascination with the culture and wanting to be linked to it, if only obliquely. I find it interesting that the fetishization of American Indian culture that happens so often with people who are more likely to also complain about cultural appropriation. It's a weird world we live in, and I'm not sure that there's ever going to be a point where the two sides meet.

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Will
The Luau Cinders



“I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day.” —Dean Martin

Very true. The line between admiration and appropriation is hard to see and largely depends on who's drawing it.

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A toast to my friends Roger and Rob. Aloha au iā ‘oe.

Here's what that line currently looks like.

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We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.

FOM MC
President
Viva El Scroties!